The state we’re in when we enter any kind of rest matters. A healthy way to enter rest is to notice that a certain cycle is coming to an end. You need to unpack it. You need to step back. That’s why a retreat is called a retreat – because we retreat, we move backward.

We’ve been moving forward. We’ve been productive. The light within us has been growing and shining. We’ve been giving. And now we sense that the cycle has reached its peak and gone past it. It’s already the evening hours – the autumn vibes. So instead of pushing on and on, we stop. We allow our energy to go down. We look back. It’s a downward and backward motion.
If you look at a circle – let’s say a clock – and find the number three on the right-hand side, that’s where the energy stops going forward and starts shifting. It stops going left to right. It starts going right to left – a backward motion. That’s where I place the state of the Wizard – the state of autumn – in the wheel model and in the cycle of life. You can check out the wheel model in my other materials. I use it as a compass to identify that I’ve come to the end of a cycle, and I need to prepare for the next one.

That’s what I do when I rest. When I enter those states of rest, I first look back at what has been done – a kind of recap. Then I allow myself to be free from it. It has been done. It has been good. And now I’m here, and I don’t have to carry it at this moment. I disconnect my identity from it. In this way, I become free. I become light – light as a feather, light as a particle of light. Magical. Transcendent. Ready to go into the next cycle. Ready for unbecoming, so that I can be reborn.

Sometimes it happens naturally – lightly. Even falling asleep is this little act of transcendence. You trust that you are going to wake up the next day. Actually, every day, an average person lets go of this grip of control over reality and drifts into the unconsciousness of sleep.

We all have this ability – and the need – to let go, so we can be restored by the natural processes inside us.

But when our controlling mechanisms, instincts, traumas, and patterns are too strong, we don’t allow ourselves to step into this stage of unpacking and preparing for rest.

That’s why this preparing for rest is important – so that we can enter it in a healthy way. Like a ritual before bed: turning off bright lights, turning off your phone. In the same way, we can prepare for larger rest – for an occasion when we clear our to-do list, and even for a retreat or sabbatical, when we understand that we really need a break from certain things in our life.

So how do we feel when we do that – when we enter rest in a healthy way?
We feel full. Good. We feel accomplished, complete. We look back at the cycle, we recap it, and then we let go. We create space for ourselves to just be. To recreate. To regenerate.

There’s a kind of repetitive motion to it. And if we’re used to it, we begin to trust our rest.

But when there’s pain – maybe some unresolved issues, something we didn’t manage to finish, or when a cycle ends abruptly – rest can be difficult. If we carry trauma around the idea of stopping, or around the loss of opportunity, or endings in general, then we might not enter the state of rest as rest at all. We might experience it as falling apart.

This is how the energy often feels at the end of any kind of cycle. And when I say “end,” I don’t mean the end of everything – just the wrapping up of a certain phase, a chapter. If it’s your business, it doesn’t mean you're closing it. If it’s your relationship, it doesn’t mean you’re breaking up. It’s just the moment when you identify that you need to take a step back – to retreat – because you need to be replenished. You need to fill your own cup before you go on.

This is a healthy process. Just like trees shedding their leaves – not because they’re dying, but because they need to stop being all-present and beautiful for a moment. For a few months. So they can do the root work.

That’s what rest is about.

But psychologically, it can be challenging. We can fall into our shadow – regret, sadness, melancholy – especially near the end of the cycle. Sometimes even before a vacation. You know that moment when the rush stops – when the drive cuts off – and the hormones that kept you ticking the boxes drop? You can feel a little lost. Maybe even a withdrawal from your working routine.

This is normal.

And when we’re conscious about it, we understand: this is part of letting go.

Letting go is the main task when we rest.

We need to just let it go.

Because when you hold on – to your ideas, to your to-do lists, to everything you plan to complete after you rest – you're not really resting. Mentally, you're still in the work.

This is the crucial ability for rest: to let go. Let it be. Let yourself just be. Let it fall apart a little bit – or completely. Release the grip.

This can feel uncomfortable. But we are able to do it.

We can be conscious. Intentional.

We can do practices. Physical ones – like putting ourselves in a supported position, where we can really melt into it. Child’s pose. Floating, if you have access to water – a pool, a floating studio. These help. Through the body, we can feel the letting go. Maybe you add some humming, some long breaths out. That can really help.

And on the mental level, we can do exercises too. One example is the yogic meditation of Neti Neti. It means, I am not this. I am not that.

The practice is simple: you sit in meditation, let thoughts arise, and say to each one, I’m not this. I’m not that. You keep doing that until they stop bothering you – or until you can sit there, unattached.

This isn’t about dissociating from life – it’s about freedom. It’s about coming back to your essence. To the eternal light of your soul within.

It’s a kind of check-in – or maybe a check-out – from what you’ve been clinging to too tightly. And for some of us – myself included – it can be hard. Because I do cling to certain things in my life. I can let go of some. Others, though – some identities, some attachments – are challenging. When I have to release them, I can’t do it without grief.

And that’s normal.

When something is really ending – in a big way – there’s no healthy way to process it other than to grieve. And even when it’s something small – your vacation ending, moving towns, saying goodbye to friends, finishing a project – if it creates a feeling of grief, that emotion is not out of place.

Emotions are messengers. They bring a signal about what’s happening inside.
And when you’re able to feel it – here – to feel is to heal.

Emotions of loss, sadness, regret – anything that makes us want to hold on to what’s already passed – those emotions are natural. And when they’re expressed in a healthy way – not destructive, but reflective, even poetic – they help us. They become a kind of celebration. A soft, affectionate goodbye. A bow to what has been.

And this belongs to the Wizard stage. The end of the cycle. The complete emptiness and reset of conscious rest.

There are tools for this.

You can journal about what has been. Write poetry. Paint something. Create a form that lets you honor the experience – and then let it go.

If there’s pain in it, creativity is a wonderful vehicle to carry it. You put it into the art – and then you step out. The emotion stays there. It’s projected onto something else. And that something else – the poem, the painting, the image – it takes some of the weight for you.

This process of letting go is at the heart of this stage. And the tools for it are many: through body, through consciousness, through art.

And what do we reach when we process it?
Hopefully – we reach freedom.

So what is this freedom?
It’s freedom from your identity – from your work.

An affirmation I return to often is:
I am not my work.

This is especially important for those of us who are passionate about what we do. Sometimes we forget to rest, because we confuse who we are with what we do. So we need to remind ourselves: If I disconnect from my work for a while, the world is not going to end. Only this cycle is going to end.

Yes, maybe something will be missed. Maybe something will be forgotten. You might lose an opportunity. But the thing is – when you reach the state of freedom, you become so light. So empty of attachments, and of the weight of assumptions, hopes, dreams – and regrets as well.

You let go of the whole cycle.
Everything that has been.
Everything that is to come.
You return completely to the present moment.
You become very, very light.

And this lightness – this spaciousness you have created through conscious release – allows you to float into the new cycle. It’s a kind of transcendence. A moment of transformation. Like New Year’s. Like spring arriving after winter.
This is how we can emerge from the state of rest – how we can come out of it.
You know that pleasant feeling – sadly, not many of us experience it regularly – when you wake up in the morning, open your eyes, and feel light? Ready to get up and face the world? Happy about the new day?

Maybe you experienced it in childhood. Maybe you remember that excitement of jumping out of bed just because the sun was up.
That’s the feeling we aim for after deep rest.

After we’ve freed ourselves. After we’ve let go into night, into retreat, into emptiness – we re-emerge on the other side, completely reborn. And a new cycle begins.

That’s the art of rest.
To create the setting for yourself to experience that kind of transition.
To recap.
To analyze.
To keep what’s good and worth remembering – the lessons, the thoughts, the experiences.
And then to let go of the rest.

Everything not precious enough to be kept – let it dissolve. Let it become like compost. Fertilizer for something new.

You're making space. In your head, in your schedule. And then – you make a leap of faith.

You let go even of your identity. Even of identifying with this work, this role, this personality.

You trust that your core essence will always be there.

And that you will re-emerge on the other side – refreshed, regenerated.
During this rest – deep rest – we don’t want to be constantly adjusting our comforts and surroundings. The art of rest here is to create a container – a frame – that will allow you to go through this transition.

If we’re speaking about a weekend, maybe do the shopping beforehand. Close your chores on Saturday. Then create an empty space for Sunday – a space where you don’t need to do anything. Where you can let go. Turn off your phone. Your fridge is full. Your mind is empty.

That’s the ideal kind of weekly rest.

Planning a longer retreat is, of course, more challenging. That’s why retreats exist as a service – so you can go somewhere and let someone else facilitate the experience. But it’s still up to you to go there with that intention. With that awareness. With that purposefulness.

To rest – not just to have fun – but to let go.

To create the empty space that will later be filled with new energy, new ideas.
And after that’s done, you’ll hopefully find yourself looking forward to the new cycle. In the wheel model, that next state is the archetype of the Child – the winter state, where inspiration begins to sprout.

But that’s another story.

So let’s recap a little what we’ve explored about rest:
We need to identify the need for rest.
We need to enter it consciously.
We need to prepare, to let go, to trust.
We need to allow sadness and beauty and emptiness.
We need to reclaim freedom – from identity, from doing, from the world’s constant demands.
And when we do, we don’t just rest.
We regenerate.
We transform.
We return home to ourselves – and begin again.